Question:
Dear Mufti Shb, I pray you are well and in Afiyah!
Recently my Daughter who is 22 & lives with me as I’m currently responsible for her as a Father? (Please can you elaborate on this who’s responsible for her) She became very ill & she went into hospital into coma & Alhamdulillah she’s out of Coma and now recovering in a ward etc. For around 4 months this is going on!
She is been cared for in the ward by trained Nurses etc. in this my wife spends all her day in hospital and claims her priority is our Daughter as she’s already been looked after!
She’s neglecting the people around her especially her husband and at times Isolating her self from me and things which needs to be done around the house! Please can you advise in the best way
[Question published as received]
The Fatwa
In the Name of Allah, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful
The Answer
May Allah the Almighty bless you and your family with good health and well-being, and may He grant your daughter a speedy recovery.
As the father of your daughter, it is your responsibility to ensure she is cared for.
During these challenging times, it’s important to be patient and cherish every moment spent serving your children as a reward. The love between a mother and her children, created by Almighty Allah, makes this situation understandable. It’s important to empathise with your wife and consider her feelings too. Have an open and honest conversation with her about how you both feel and explore ways to fulfil each other’s rights as spouses.
The Fiqh
Mullā Khusrū (d.885 AH), a prominent Ḥanafī jurist, states that providing financial support for an adult who is unable to earn is an obligation upon father. Just like the father is responsible for the financial maintenance for his spouse and minor dependents, he is responsible for the maintenance of an adult offspring who is unable to financially maintain themselves. The effective cause for this law and the legal reason is ‘ijz (inability and weakness); it is for this reason the father is responsible to maintain his minors. Both, the minor and adult are unable to work. Imam al-Kasani (d.587 AH) and Imam al-Sarakhsi (d.483 AH) further highlight that looking after one’s children is in reality looking after oneself, as one’s children are ultimately from oneself; so just as it is obligatory to maintain oneself, it is obligatory to maintain one’s dependent children, as they are an extension of yourself.
The Rationale
Beyond the emotional call to maintain one’s children, logically, maintaining one’s children is also very rational. Children are the most prominent resources and assets for oneself. They are your helping hands and the identity of a man; hence the practice of Kunya (teknonym) is there to honour the father by being named with the eldest child of his. Thus, to upkeep and maintain one’s identity, resources and assets is only for one’s ultimate benefit, and is only praiseworthy.
And Almighty Allah Alone Knows Best
Maulana Ammar Y Badat
Trainee Mufti
Reviewed and approved by
Mufti Faraz Adam
Darul Iftaa Muadh ibn Jabal
www.fatwa-centre.com | www.darulfiqh.com
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(وَمِنْهَا) أَيْ مِنْ أَسْبَابِ وُجُوبِ النَّفَقَةِ (النَّسَبُ فَتَجِبُ عَلَى الْأَبِ خَاصَّةً) لَا يَشْرِكُهُ أَحَدٌ فِيهَا (كَنَفَقَةِ أَبَوَيْهِ وَزَوْجَتِهِ) أَيْ كَمَا لَا يَشْرِكُهُ أَحَدٌ فِي نَفَقَتِهِمْ (وَلَوْ كَانَ) الْأَبُ (فَقِيرًا) لِقَوْلِهِ تَعَالَى {وَعَلَى الْمَوْلُودِ لَهُ رِزْقُهُنَّ وَكِسْوَتُهُنَّ} [البقرة: ٢٣٣] وَالْمَوْلُودُ لَهُ هُوَ الْأَبُ (لِوَلَدِهِ) مُتَعَلِّقٌ بِقَوْلِهِ تَجِبُ (الْفَقِيرِ) حَالَ كَوْنِهِ (صَغِيرًا) حَتَّى لَوْ كَانَ الصَّغِيرُ غَنِيًّا فَهِيَ فِي مَالِهِ (أَوْ كَبِيرًا عَاجِزًا عَنْ الْكَسْبِ) حَتَّى لَوْ لَمْ يَعْجِزْ عَنْهُ لَمْ تَجِبْ نَفَقَتُهُ عَلَى أَبِيهِ (درر الحكام شرح غرر الأحكام)
(وتجب) النفقة بأنواعها على الحر (لطفله) يعم الانثى والجمع (الفقير) الحر، فإن نفقة المملوك على مالكه والغني في ماله الحاضر، فلو غائبا فعلى الاب ثم يرجع إن أشهد (الدرالمختار شرح تنوير الأبصار)
قَوْلُهُ الْفَقِيرِ) أَيْ إنْ لَمْ يَبْلُغْ حَدَّ الْكَسْبِ، فَإِنْ بَلَغَهُ كَانَ لِلْأَبِ أَنْ يُؤْجِرَهُ أَوْ يَدْفَعَهُ فِي حِرْفَةٍ لِيَكْتَسِبَ وَيُنْفِقَ عَلَيْهِ مِنْ كَسْبِهِ لَوْ كَانَ ذَكَرًا، بِخِلَافِ الْأُنْثَى كَمَا قَدَّمَهُ فِي الْحَضَانَةِ عَنْ الْمُؤَيِّدِيَّةِ. قَالَ الْخَيْرُ الرَّمْلِيُّ: لَوْ اسْتَغْنَتْ الْأُنْثَى بِنَحْوِ خِيَاطَةٍ وَغَزْلٍ يَجِبُ أَنْ تَكُونَ نَفَقَتُهَا فِي كَسْبِهَا كَمَا هُوَ ظَاهِرٌ، وَلَا نَقُولُ تَجِبُ عَلَى الْأَبِ مَعَ ذَلِكَ، إلَّا إذَا كَانَ لَا يَكْفِيهَا فَتَجِبُ عَلَى الْأَبِ كِفَايَتُهَا بِدَفْعِ الْقَدْرِ الْمَعْجُوزِ عَنْهُ، وَلَمْ أَرَهُ لِأَصْحَابِنَا. وَلَا يُنَافِيهِ قَوْلُهُمْ بِخِلَافِ الْأُنْثَى؛ لِأَنَّ الْمَمْنُوعَ إيجَارُهَا، وَلَا يَلْزَمُ مِنْهُ عَدَمُ إلْزَامِهَا بِحِرْفَةٍ تَعْلَمُهَا. اهـ أَيْ الْمَمْنُوعَ إيجَارُهَا لِلْخِدْمَةِ وَنَحْوِهَا مِمَّا فِيهِ تَسْلِيمُهَا لِلْمُسْتَأْجِرِ بِدَلِيلِ قَوْلِهِمْ؛ لِأَنَّ الْمُسْتَأْجِرَ يَخْلُو بِهَا وَذَا لَا يَجُوزُ فِي الشَّرْعِ، وَعَلَيْهِ فَلَهُ دَفْعُهَا لِامْرَأَةٍ تُعَلِّمُهَا حِرْفَةً كَتَطْرِيزٍ وَخِيَاطَةٍ مَثَلًا ) حاشية ابن عابدين رد المحتار(
ولِأنَّ الإنْفاقَ عِنْدَ الحاجَةَ مِن بابِ إحْياءِ المُنْفَقِ عَلَيْهِ والوَلَدُ جُزْءُ الوالِدِ وإحْياءُ نَفْسِهِ واجِبٌ كَذا إحْياءُ جُزْئِهِ واعْتِبارُ هَذا المَعْنى يُوجِبُ النَّفَقَةَ مِن الجانِبَيْنِ ولِأنَّ هَذِهِ القَرابَةَ مُفْتَرَضَةُ الوَصْلِ مُحَرَّمَةُ القَطْعِ بِالإجْماعِ والإنْفاقُ مِن بابِ الصِّلَةِ فَكانَ واجِبًا وتَرْكُهُ مَعَ القُدْرَةِ لِلْمُنْفِقِ وتَحَقُّقِ حاجَةِ المُنْفَقِ عَلَيْهِ يُؤَدِّي إلى القَطْعِ فَكانَ حَرامًا (بدائع الصنائع)
قالَ: ولا يُجْبَرُ المُعْسِرُ عَلى نَفَقَةِ أحَدٍ، إلّا عَلى نَفَقَةِ الزَّوْجَةِ والوَلَدِ الصَّغِيرِ، أمّا اسْتِحْقاقُ نَفَقَةِ الزَّوْجَةِ بِاعْتِبارِ العَقْدِ وأمّا الأوْلادُ الصِّغارُ فَلِأنَّهُمْ أجْزاؤُهُ فَكَما لا تَسْقُطُ عَنْهُ نَفَقَةُ نَفْسِهِ لِعُسْرَتِهِ، فَكَذَلِكَ نَفَقَةُ أوْلادِهِ والأصْلُ فِيهِ قَوْله تَعالى ﴿ومَن قُدِرَ عَلَيْهِ رِزْقُهُ فَلْيُنْفِقْ مِمّا آتاهُ اللَّهُ﴾ [الطلاق ٧] (المبسوط للسرخسي)